just another stressful realization so thought-consuming and intense, it' s bound to later sneakily manifest itself as an ulcer, psoriasis, or stroke

Today I got a scary-scary-scary email from my mom.
She wanted me to know that I am covered by her auto insurance at a dependant’s rate only until August 31st. Beginning September 1st I can expect my auto insurance to increase from about $80 a month to $180 a month.
I am also covered by her dental/medical insurance only through August 31st. I don’t even know if I can obtain medical insurance through my workplace in that time because I declined it six months ago when I was hired, and I’m pretty sure they don’t even offer dental insurance to anyone less than management. Fuck the costs, I’m pretty sure no matter how much it costs I’m ineligible. Not to mention, even if I worked to obtain insurance through Applebees – that’s not exactly a reliable base for insurance, as I’m not so sure I want to be working there very long anyway? I sure didn’t labor away at college for 4 years just to get saddled down in a waitressing gig.
It gets better. My current budget is nothing short of strapped. And believe it or not, about $250 of each month’s rent has been subsidized by bond money I’ve slowly withdrawn from my college savings account. That money runs out at the end of May.
I am pretty sure that on September 1st I am going to get evicted, crash my car, be sent to the ER, have all my teeth knocked out by a loan shark when I can’t repay my enormous black-market debt, then bleed to death on the cold, cold street, and DIE. I wonder if I should get life insurance now too?
Approximately every five or six seconds, no matter whether I am in classes, at work, sleeping, out with friends, blogging, everything – one of my inner voices screams, “What the heck am I doing with my life?!?!?!”